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I'm Casey. 18. Florida. Christian. University of Florida.

bewwbs:

how to get girls to like you:

  1. compliment their eyebrows
  2. eat them out
You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever.

That’s why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it.

How I Met Your Mother  (via saintofsass)

unheat:

Sometimes I think you love me. Sometimes I think you like me. Other times, I think I’m nobody to you. Yeah, this sucks.

Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’

— Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via hate)



promiscuous-petal:

enough about sex positions has anyone discovered a reading position which doesn’t get uncomfortable after 5 minutes

Tina Fey for American Express, 2007-2014


ninfia:

im going to inject garlic bread into my blood stream